When with a friend the other day, they said how much they appreciate that I can say “no” with authority without being rude, given my past.

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My response? A nervous smile and laugh.

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She wasn’t wrong, though. Over the years, I have been reclaiming my voice, my confidence, and my life so that I can grow into the person I wish to be.  

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When I walk into a room and am expected to lead, I freeze on the inside. Most of the time, that does not show on the outside. Only a select few have managed to notice when I’m faking things.

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But this is another thing I am working on. I love to follow, but I also enjoy leading when it is necessary. When I lead, I want to do it with a bit more confidence - the confidence I used to have.

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When trying out for RENT, I was asked by many friends, “Why do you want Maureen?” I always had two answers:

1) I want the power to make a room “Moo” (Those of you who get it, get it; for those who don’t, come see what I mean in November)

2) It would stretch my acting ability, as we could not be more different

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And I am honoured to get that chance!

 

After a very short audition process, with a very supportive audition panel, I get to play the role of Maureen. I get to not only grow my skills as a performer but also command the room with confidence.

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As I continue to grow, I am so looking forward to how this character will help me continue to become the person I am meant to be and gain back traits that I lost.

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The main thing to remember, though, as we grow, is to be sure to take moments not to be too serious. Take time to be goofy, have fun, and make mistakes… and even “moo”.

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Trust me - it’s hard to do without a smile on your face.