Health is an odd thing. Over the last few years, I’ve been reminded how little control we truly have over it as I watch family and friends face their own health struggles.
 

One morning, in grade 10, I woke up with a headache.
 

After seeing countless specialists, trying several medications, and one painkiller addiction, I was fortunate to find a cure after almost five years of looking for one.
 

The muscles in my neck and shoulders were unusually tight, similar to those in severe accident or concussion cases.

The kicker: I had never been in a car accident or played any sports, so the cause will forever remain a mystery.
 

As I watch others I love start to deal with their own health issues, I am reminded of my own journey - things that were said, how it felt, and how easy it can be to simply love and care for someone during this scary point of their life.
 

If you know anyone going through a health crisis right now, I have 3 very simple DO NOTS for you to follow:
 

#1 DO NOT TELL THEM THAT THEY ARE NOT BELIEVING IN PRAYER ENOUGH

I had a youth pastor tell me this. I had come back to Ontario, as I was living out west at the time. After talking to my parents, and missing a good number of things, we decided it was best I come home. Between sleeping and appointments, I tried to do other things to have as normal a life as possible. After being prayed for one day, I was then asked how I felt. I said I felt no different - it was then I was told: “Then you aren’t believing that prayer can work.”
 

#2 DO NOT TELL THEM OTHERS ARE STRUGGLING WITH WORSE THINGS IN LIFE

Multiple people told me at different times that others had it worse than I did: “Well, you don’t have cancer.” “It can’t be that bad - you can get out of bed, unlike some people.” “You still have a family and friends supporting you, so you shouldn’t feel alone.”
 

#3 DO NOT TELL THEM THEY CANNOT BE MAD AT GOD

Professors, pastors, and a good number of people told me that to be mad at God was sin, but I was mad and felt I couldn’t keep it in. For me to be mad doesn’t mean you trust Him less or don’t believe in Him; nor does He think less of you. Anger can be a part of any relationship; it’s an emotion that we all have within us. Anger should simply have a moment and not linger, but, as with any emotion, it comes up day to day.
 

Think you can remember those 3 DO NOTS and NOT do them?
 

When dealing with a health issue, yes, they are all different, but different does not mean that one is less than the other, just as one person should not be less than another.
 

As a caregiver, you are allowed to have your own days of frustration, as loving someone who is sick takes a lot of strength and grace and can be tiring for everyone.
 

But again, as I have said before, it is not our role to judge - it is simply our role to love!